Friday, July 11, 2014

Not fooling anybody

Look, I like a one-liner as much as the next guy. However some people just don't know when to quit! I present to you SCHOOL BUS:
I mean, why would you do this? I'm all for customizing cars, even with a few cans of spray paint, but a school bus theme on your super-stretched limo?
This thing was parked out in the barren wastelands of the Brooklyn waterfront below Sunset Park, making it even more ominous (though where else are you gonna get a gargantuan parking space to fit the budget of whoever made this monstrosity?).

As I leaned in closer I realized something was odd about that back window tint. 
They just painted the window black! Very thoughtful to leave the 3rd brake light exposed, but look at the heavy drips of paint dried on there. That is not rain I can tell you! Somebody just clambered up onto the trunk with a bucket of glossy black paint and started slapping it on there, getting their grubby smudges all over the yellow in the process.

Consistency is key when creating SCHOOL BUS, so be sure to paint the side windows black as well! *Just remember to leave large squares of unpainted window so you can see all the jealous expressions of the passersby.
This is a bright red toad in the jungle. Everything about it screams; "Warning! Nothing good can come from approaching this vehicle!"
Outlining the body lines in black was another attempt at really making this look like a bus, and I think they totally succeeded. The guy with the black paint need to be fired though for sloppiness.
If you're gonna do it, take more than 20 minutes and at least put some tape over the lights!
Okay, actually, I take it all back! They actually went through the trouble of attaching one of those fold-out STOP signs to the side!?!?!? I surrender; SCHOOL BUS is magnificent just for that one detail.
Part of me wants to see the inside, but most of me never wants to enter a vehicle with the windows painted black that has a child-oriented theme. We'll just leave this one to the docks and hope it's not some Venus Flytrap for people.

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