This is the tuned car.

This is the tuned car.

My friends have been outpacing me drastically with the automotive finds and today is no different! Robin of Omaha recently stumbled upon a brace of beautiful Buicks:

This is a 1966 Buick Riviera in what seems to be an aftermarket two-tone graphite over black with a fearsome red stripe dividing the colors. The reason we know this is a '66 as opposed to the almost-identical '67 is the fact that those angled square lenses on the sides do not have a horizontal bar going down the middle of them. Even though they're large those are just the turn signals on the sides. This ride has 4 headlights hidden concealed in the grill. When they're open they look a bit crowded in there to me.

This ride is largely the same as the Cadillac Eldorado and Oldsmobile Toronado of the same year. However unlike the others the Riviera is a traditional rear wheel drive car. This is the final year for the venerable Buick Nailhead motor, this one a 425 V8.

Obviously the lines on this ride are fantastic and dramatic! The rear roofline swooping down to frame the trunk makes this beast seem like it's moving while standing still.
*Notice the lack of little vent windows! This is the first year since the '30s that a Buick didn't have them.

This is an evil ride with the black bumpers (something I usually frown upon). The vents beneath the back window are where the air exits the cabin as a part of the fresh air system.

Right next to the '66 is this 1967 Riviera with its tell tale horizontal turn signal bars. This is a mild custom like its brethren so the chrome hood trim has been shaved. 

I couldn't find any proof of two-tone Rivieras from the factory but this is a pretty common restoration choice. The mirrors on this ride are later replacements (the other ride has the correct driver-only chrome unit). 

I dig this roofline without the vinyl roof too. The wheels on both rides work really well. Both of these have the optional bucket seat interior essentially making them 4 seaters.

Somebody added a little pin striping to this ride.

1967 saw a new engine for Buick; the 430 V8 good for 360 horsepower and a whopping 475lbs of torque! Even at a weight of over 2 tons it was enough to move this beast around with alacrity. 

Buick (and indeed all of GM) was riding high through the '60s and they were understandably proud of the Riviera. It was touted as the "Tuned car" in their literature. In fact the entire opening paragraph is so assured that I'm going to close it out with this quote:
"We regret to destroy (again) the old theory that great road machines always come from Europe. But this one comes from exotic, far away Flint, Michigan - home of Buick, home of the Tuned car."

Let's welcome the weekend with a Malaise hangover

COASTING ALONG ON ITS NAME

I think I was trolling the blocks of Kensington in Brooklyn when I ran across this slab. With its dated styling cues such as the padded landau vinyl roof it looks like the last one to leave the '70s party. Laugh all you want people, I present to you the Motor Trend Car of the Year for 1979!

This is actually a 1984-1985 Buick Riviera in one of a few Silvers they offered that year. As befitting the yawn-inducing decade that the '80s were for General Motors they list 7 different versions of gray and silver, followed by a further 10 soft blues and greens that could be mistaken for gray. It's like a mighty fog descended over the art department that couldn't be cleared.

Oh man. Sometimes a car just looks like it's reflecting on a life of wasted opportunities. Sad down turned eyes and chipped teeth. Bad posture. "The kids don't even call at Christmas anymore" this expression seems to be saying.

On a less emotional level you can identify the age somewhat by the grill changes over the years. This "waterfall" grill design was used in 1980, and then again in '84-'85. Someone took the hood ornament which is a stylized R in a chrome oval.

The Riviera name harkens back to 1963 when Buick took the Paris Auto Show by storm in its debut. Sir William Lyons (the founder of Jaguar) and Sergio Pininfarina (responsible for some of the most celebrated Ferrari designs in history) both lavished praise on the car. Unfortunately like many storied nameplates it ended up being slapped on some truly forgettable slabs over the years. Talk to the 1986 Chevy Nova or Dodge Charger and ask them how they feel.

This is the doppelganger to the Caddy in which DeNiro was almost blown up in Casino. The Olds Toronado, too, was the same front wheel drive, long hood short deck 2 door coupe. It does have some gangster lines with its big wheel arches and overall presence, at least when parked. The engine choices were a maligned list of GM failures such as an underpowered diesel, a turbocharged V6 (which was a spectacular motor but not in this big car), and a 307 V8 that was starved of power due to emissions. Despite all this a 1983 turbocharged V6 Riviera convertible was chosen as the pace car for that years Indy 500.

Once the sign of forward thinking design now gaudy paste jewelry on a dowager.

Here we see another indication that this car is not from 1980 as the grill suggests it could be. The taillights had that horizontal line bisecting it only in '84-'85. The plastic trim around both front and read bumpers has been obliterated by years of being parked on the streets. That gargantuan bumper look perfect though.

From this angle with the sunroof option on display and pretty much the coolest '80s GM wheels available it looks alright. For the decade this is actually a swoopy Coke Bottle design.

Pardon my finger reflection, but at least you can see the towel showing you how to do sit-ups. The leather is deep and creamy, meant to coddle even the most hemorrhoidal bum. The dashboard is like a wooden building with vents and electronics filling the windows.

The back is even more so creamy and dreamy. the center rectangle is an armrest you can pull down when you're not heavy petting (this IS the Riviera). Ashtrays, though not on display in these pics, abound.

Well there we are; one more great big slab of dreariness in the books. I suppose if I had to make an escape I wouldn't mind climbing on board and shoving this thing down the street, but really I'm having a hard time finding redeeming features on this car. 

The late-'70s is often offered up as the lowest point in domestic automotive design. To me those cars were underpowered for sure, but interesting in the scope of their bad timing. To me this is the very lowest ebb for cars in America. Japan so thoroughly had its hands around the neck of Detroit at this point that the movie Gung Ho came out. Ford was busy building the Taurus which would slowly get things back on track, but for now, Riviera.