Almost the Heartbeat of America

ALMOST THE HEARTBEAT OF AMERICA

I was walking around some area of Brooklyn that looks like the pics below (Dyker Heights? Bensonhurst? My own beloved Bay Ridge?) when this '80s Bro-mobile presented itself:

Yeah Bro!
This is a 1983-1985 Chevrolet Monte Carlo SS in White.
I know this car well because I went to high school in Carmel, New York from the late '80s through the early '90s. The Monte Carlo was ubiquitous with the gold-chain-over-your-black-sweater crowd. 

The Super Sport got this nifty aerodynamic front that incorporated the bumper and grill/headlight surrounds as one piece. The standard Monte had a chrome bumper below a stand-up grill and headlights set flush into the facade as opposed to these inset ones.

This shape is familiar to anyone who drove a Buick Regal, Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme, or Monte Carlo from 1978-1988. This is the G-Body platform (though from '78-'82 they referred to it as the A-Body even though it is the same). The G-Body cars were some of the final front engine, rear wheel drive domestic rides produced en masse. Sure the Taxi & Police stalwarts like the Crown Vic, Caprice, and luxury 4 door sleds from Buick & Cadillac continued through the '90s, but the nameplates that used the G-Body all went front wheel drive after '88.

The Chevy Bow Tie emblem sitting above the trunk lock is nicely understated. Our feature Monte was built moments before the Heartbeat of America ad campaign came out (which ran from '86-'93). While I couldn't locate a commercial for this exact car I did find a vintage Motor Trend review that surprisingly extolls the high performance capabilities of the '83 SS! Never mind that a basic Honda can outperform everything but the top speed these days. *Bonus campy faux moonshiner acting really makes it a groaner to watch.
That little spoiler/wing didn't do much but it was standard with the SS. Dual exhaust was also a part of the SS option package, as was a special "race-blue" interior (according to their brochure).

Since I'm featuring a car for sale I figure I ought to include the number in case a Monte Carlo fan is looking for a clean '80s SS. Those 6x9 speakers on the back deck could only be made more period correct if there was a Bazooka tube in the trunk hooked up to an Alpine deck.

For a while in the early '80s you could get bizarre combinations in your Monte Carlo. Diesel engines were available from '78-'84 (there were only 168 diesel Montes built in that final year!). Both 3 and 4 speed manual transmissions were optional from '78-'80. The Buick turbocharged V6 was a rare option in '80 which actually became a 1 year only model in '81 called the Monte Carlo Turbo. The famous Buick Grand National was essentially a G-Body Regal with that turbo motor and it was briefly the fastest American production car available, even beating out the Corvette!

From the side this thing looks capable and mean with its aerodynamic front and rear spoilers. This body style was very effective in Nascar during the late '70s. To try and retake some checkered flags in in 1987 they introducing the Monte Carlo Aerocoupe. The main difference between the regular and the Aerocoupe was that the back window was angled from the roofline to the rear of the trunk for greater aerodynamics. It is rare today (the Pontiac version was called the 2+2 and is even rarer).
Well that's that for this G-Body ride. My very first car was an '83 Cutlass Supreme Brougham that looked just like this (except for my sweet burgundy landau roof). When I was in my teenage years and people around me were getting their licenses these were some of the most common cars around. If I had a parking space I would consider another as a daily driver. If you like to work on your car this is the last gasp for old-school technology so they're easy and simple. If you do pick one up do yourself a favor and acquire some Z Cavaricci gear so you can come correct!  

Brawny Bay Ridge Bumblebee

BRAWNY BAY RIDGE BUMBLEBEE

I strolled around the block from my house recently and this striking brute was waiting for me:

This is a 1972 Chevrolet Chevelle SS in Cream Yellow. This thing dead lifts more than you and has a tribal tattoo around it's bicep.
There are 2 simple ways to discern a '72 from the almost-identical '71. Those turn signals consist of a single lens on each side whereas they were split into 2 stacked rectangles previously. In addition there are 2 horizontal bars in this grill where the '71 had one. In the interest of overall toughness the owner has blacked out the chrome bars on this grill* (which is nothing compared to having a black hood and trunk I suppose).
*For the record there was a blacked out version of this grill as a part of the Heavy Chevy package. That was more of a base model Chevelle with the big engine than a true SS.

The Super Sport package had been available in some form on various Chevys since it was an option for the 1961 Impala (my favorite Impala for what it's worth). It has varied from a simple dress up package that adds stripes and badges to a legitimate performance upgrade. This year is thankfully the latter with front and rear sway bars joining that fire breathing V8 under the hood.

This ride is just beautiful in that delicate Cream Yellow. Chrome trim is very understated with thin moldings around the wheel wells, front and rear glass, and the drip rail above the doors only.

This was the final year for the Cowl Induction hood that brought fresh air directly into the thirsty 4 barrel carburetor. When it's hooked up properly it remains closed until you stomp your foot on the gas when a vacuum actuator pulls it open. When there is no vacuum in the system or it's not hooked up it stays open like this. As bad ass as this sweet detail is it added no horsepower to the car but who cares? COWL INDUCTION bro yes!
*Those functional hood pins are a part of the Cowl Induction hood package by the way.

This car is outfitted with the mightiest of the mighty for Chevrolet; the 7.4 liter Turbo-Jet 454 V8. The way horsepower had been rated had changed to net as opposed to gross in 1971 so the 454 was rated at "only" 270 HP (those are air quotes for effect you grammar nazis). The net HP was supposed to approximate the power at the wheels and the gross would be what the engine produced on its own. The gross HP for this engine was probably more like 365 but there is no disputing the torque rating which was a whopping 390lbs.

This ride is outfitted with the optional Strato-Bucket seats and a console mounted slap shifter for the automatic transmission. There's also a color coordinated Yellow Little Tree hanging off the dash which is Jasmin (I looked it up). Points for consistency.

This is the last year for the second generation Chevelle which debuted in 1968. While the body dimensions are the same the '68-'69 version looked very different in the front with a forward leaning grill containing quad headlights. For 1970 only there were quad lights with body color surrounds before switching to single headlights such as this ride.

I love the continuity across lines within Chevrolet for 1972. The Camaro had similar taillights as did the Corvette. Each taillight is actually different but they look identical to the layman. A single Michigan plate? Normally I would launch into a diatribe about how you'll never get a ticket in Brooklyn with one out of state plate on any car but this one is too nice so I think it's legit.

This is the mid size GM muscle car body which was shared by the Buick Skylark/Gran Sport, Oldsmobile Cutlass/442, and Pontiac LeMans/GTO. These cars sold spectacularly well overall, with the Chevelle being the 2nd best selling American car of 1972. Many consider 1970 to be the ultimate moment in the Muscle Car craze due to a combination of unbridled horsepower and lack of regulation. This generation Chevelle was square in the middle of the craze.

If I were smarter, more patient, or better prepared I would've saved this for my 454th post but too bad. My desires usually move away from such common cars as illustrated by my 1st gen Mustang takedown but I'm giving this one a pass. Why is that? The car above represents the final moments of the muscle car era with few exceptions (the Super Duty Trans Am from 1974 is, in my opinion, the very last remnant of the original MC era). The 454 wasn't even listed in most of the Chevelle brochures of the day. 1973 would introduce a new, larger era for Chevelle the likes of which can be seen in the movie Drive*. While those cars are cool enough it's a major departure from these more athletic rides.
*Heads-up music will play the moment that clip starts!