Puerto Rican pony con Señor Frijole!

PUERTO RICAN PONY CON SEÑOR FRIJOLE!

I was walking into Red Hook from the area around the Hugh Carey Tunnel (that's the Brooklyn Battery to you ol' timers) when I saw the most Puerto Ricanist car ever!

¡Mano! This is a 1971 Ford Mustang Mach-1 in flat black with the Puerto Rican flag straight-up painted onto the hood.

The Mach-1 gave you a spoiler, this double scoop hood, a wing, and some graphics. Who's that behind the wheel?

BWAHH HA HA HA yes! Mr. Bean's face was hanging down from the visor in a supreme move of goofy humor.

I've featured all kinds of Mustangs lately because it seems that they're head to head with old Cadillacs in sheer numbers on the Brooklyn streets. I won't bother with too much in the way of actual information on this ride.

Around the time of the annual Puerto Rican Day Parade in NYC you see cars draped with flags. There are always a few folks who take an entire flag and wrap their hood but I've never seen it painted on until now.

Back in 2014 I featured a '71 Mach-1 in the factory color Anti Establish Mint (a type of mint green). *This year/make/model was also the star of 2 very different car chases. The first was piloted by James Bond in Diamonds are Forever. Bumbling yokel cops frantically try to catch up on the old Las Vegas strip circa 1971.
The other is one of the longest (if not the longest) car chase ever! The LOW budget original Gone in 60 Seconds finishes up with a 45 minute extravaganza through the whole of Southern California. Over 200 cars are wrecked in the process. When I was 12 years old I bowed down before 2 gods: this terrible movie and the Road Warrior.

400th post Super Hooptie!

JOSEPH AND THE TECHNICOLOR NIGHTMARE COAT

This is my 400th installment of the Hoopties blog and to commemorate I've selected a real beauty. With any luck I'll be cobbling together posts for another few years but for now get the Vision ready:

Blech!
At some point back in history this was a 1967 Pontiac Catalina in (I think) Montreaux Blue Poly. Throughout the decades it has morphed into something more horrific; a patchwork quilt of childrens nightmares. If you squint just right the paint job looks like a deep blue sky with white puffy clouds and the red streaks of the End Times taking hold. Ladies and gentlemen; this car is the last page of Revelation.

Historical indeed! This thing has eyes dangling in broken sockets and scars all over its face. The admittedly huge bumper has earned its keep with evidence of a mighty uppercut and a massive body blow folding in into the fender.

It wears a Dodge hubcap like a serial killer keeping trophies of its victims. There is no side mirror on the door because who cares? When you pilot this wreck you're living in a post-turn signal and mirror society. If the brake lights work at all it's by sheer accident.

There's patina and then there's THIS.
Pontiac got its name from the war chief Pontiac of the Odawa tribe. He fought against the British occupation of the Great Lakes region and was effective enough that the war is known as Pontiac's War (1763-1766). It began when Chief Pontiac lead 300 warriors to take Fort Detroit by surprise. I don't mean to blaspheme too hard but this car: A. Looks like it was in a war, and B. looks like Detroit was caught by surprise mid-build.

This picture hurts me deeply and I took it. That futuristic green wheel looks as if this slab either traveled to space or back to ancient Egypt and brought back a bronze medallion. Ancient Aliens made this car.
*Big shout out to the person holding the black Krylon can when inspiration struck! Continuing the window line down to the wheel well is sweet. By "wheel well" I mean the rough opening where some bear chewed through the body.

Somebody warn that VW in front of it, or maybe it's too late!

These frowning bulldog jowl taillights are a true favorite of mine, lest I forget to add that I love this car. I distinctly remember trailing behind a blue '68 Bonneville convertible on a Rhode Island highway doing 80mph that had these exact taillights. I fell into a multi-year crush on that year make & model that day.

This massive fastback design would only last a few years in full size GM cars. In 1967 there wasn't a single thought to excess so the fact that this is a 2 door coupe on a gargantuan scale was normal.

It's so hard to look directly at the colors of this thing. I feel like I need to adjust the settings.

I've said it before but this thing is YUGE. From the door forward it looks like any big '60s car. Somehow the sloping rear that goes on forever accentuates the grandeur for me.

Fuzzy dice? Really? Is this set up for cruise night or something?
The ashtray being pulled out I get. Hopefully the driver of this goes through a carton of Winstons just getting to the remaining OTB outposts in New Jersey.
This example is outfitted with a bench seat covered in human skin and a column shift transmission. There was a version of this body style called the 2+2 that had front and rear bucket seats as well as a console. Those are rare and plenty sought after.
*I feel the need to point out that this car does not have 2 factory radios even though it looks it. The climate controls were done in a way that makes them seem identical.

Once the silver bullet has pierced the werewolf heart or a wooden stake has claimed the vampire you get a fleeting glimpse of the original person before they expire. I'm reminded of that from this angle where you can just make out the original Catalina trapped inside. 

I feel like I do this every time I post a Pontiac from the bird beak front era, but here goes:

Head of Pontiac design 1966-1982.

Since this post was short on detail and long on hyperbole let me close out by stating that this car came with either a 400 or 428 V8. The base 400 with 2 barrel was rated at 290 Horsepower, but there were various options that would push the hp as high as 376. Even with 6 adults trapped inside this thing could get up and go with the best of them.
As for me I've somehow never owned a Pontiac even though they are my favorite domestic make (or were but let's not bother with the final decade or so before GM pulled the plug). I even like Pontiacs that I should feel foolish about liking such as the early-to-mid '80s 6000, Sunbird, Astre, and Grand Am. Someday when I have a parking spot in my life I'll unlock that achievement but for now I'll be happy finding things like this wreck in the wild.

Vehicle as rugged appliance

VEHICLE AS RUGGED APPLIANCE

When I was visiting my sister in Oregon I snapped so many cool old rides that I've been doling them out slowly so as not to have an Oregon Month (not that that's a bad thing but I'll let some proud Oregonian take that on). Today we'll focus on this beasty:

This is a 1960 or newer Willys Station Wagon (officially listed as model 6-226) in what I believe to be the faded factory color Redwood. 

One look tells you everything you need to know about this rig. Your first impressions probably go something like this: "dirty, big, old, sturdy, truck". Exactly!

This beast is actually the first all steel station wagon ever produced with all previous wagons having rear bodies made at least partially, and many times entirely, of wood. Today we would think of this as an SUV but 70 years ago when first introduced it was closer to a car than a truck. This really is the first crossover as well.

Pinpointing the date on utilitarian rigs like this can be tough to do. Sometimes a change will be made mid-year with no real announcement. Other times a change might be made for one market but not the other. Things I'm going by when declaring this as a 1960-1965 model ('65 was the end of production) are the 3 horizontal grill bars (down from 5 in 1954), single windshield (from a split unit in '59) and the large back window which definitely wasn't around in the '50s yet seemed to remain optional for a bit while 2 smaller rear windows remained available.

I can tell you that this is not a Deluxe model as there would've been a fat chrome stripe following that horizontal belt line that bisects the door. *I want to point out that shelf located just behind the front fender which is replicated on the other side. These are for spare gas cans. The owner of this rig is ready to head off on epic adventures away from society and it looks like they already have!

This design is a stroke of genius by industrial designer Brooks Stevens. His landmark design achievements are numerous but let's just highlight the fact that he is responsible for the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile!

Everything about this says rugged and capable. It has big wheels but not huge and the tread is pretty well worn from use. The back window is long gone, being somewhat replaced by wire fencing material. I don't know what that grate would protect against besides a bird or racoon invasion (though it looks like something got in on the left side).

The true genius behind this design is the body itself, what it consists of, and who made it. In 1946 when the first Willys Station Wagon was released automobile bodies were in very high demand. WWII halted auto production in the States from 1942-1945 and the pent up demand for vehicles combined with the glorious national mood of victory meant everybody wanted a new ride now. Brooks Stevens with his background in Industrial as opposed to Automotive design came up with a matter-of-fact solution: the body would consist of metal typically used for household appliances that could be fashioned and assembled by sheet metal fabricators. This truck is therefore more of an appliance than a passenger vehicle which is fitting for such a no nonsense ride.

Let's give a shout-out for how beautiful an Oregon summer day can be! It was almost exactly 100 degrees this entire week though which was blowing the minds of the locals.

We can see from this angle that the quaint original taillights have been replaced with small red lights screwed directly into the body. Small mailbox reflectors have been added to the tailgate and rear quarter panels.

Even though this is the first steel bodied station wagon the design of the body mimics that of a wooden bodied car. The dark painted panels in the door illustrate this well; if you were to paint the recessed rectangles brown and the raised portions more of a blond tan color it really would look like wood. Painting the roof a dark color would also approximate the cloth tops of the wood frame wagons. In a more practical sense those ribbed portions add rigidity to the body side which would otherwise be vast sheets of metal prone to warping.

You've gotta love the interior of this simple beast!
A centrally mounted gauge contains only the speedometer, temperature, and fuel level. Below that you have an ashtray (of course!), and knobs for choke, lights, and the wipers. That fan mounted over the right shoulder of the driver tells you all you need to know about climate control.
*Dashboards with central gauge clusters are a stroke of genius for vehicles meant for the worldwide market. All you have to do for this to be registered in New Zealand is move the steering wheel and pedals to the other side as everything else is the same.

Here we have either a charming lie or a thorough owner who is updating their emblems as the vehicle evolves. When first built this truck had a 4 or 6 cylinder in either flathead or overhead cam design. The 327 is a Chevy small block V8 engine introduced in 1962. With the trailer hitch and signs of modern use I'm guessing there is a 327 under the hood.

Well that's where we'll leave this eager mongrel. The Willys station wagons are some of the most widely available "ran when parked" classics out there, usually advertised with caveats like "haven't tried to start it" or more threateningly "please understand that this is a classic project and if you think you'll just buy it and drive across the country don't waste my time!". To see one on the move is extremely rare which is a shame as their basic makeup and legendary capability make it a cool cruiser. The ultimate version of this is the late '40s Willys Jeepster which is a 2 door convertible with the same front end as this ride. Regardless that fact that this thing could be 40 miles off road in the woods somewhere even as I type this makes me smile.

Amazing old Hemi enjoying retirement near the ocean

CONEY ISLAND HEMI!

I rode out to Coney Island the other day and all the way out on the end of Ocean Parkway within blocks of the beach I passed this cruddy beast:

This is a 1954 Dodge Coronet in what was probably Willow Green. The paint job has gone through plenty of transformation over the years though as you will see.

This is quite the handsome ride. Cars from the early-to-mid '50s were some of the first new designs since the beginning of WWII since production halted in 1942 through the end of the war. When the war was over there was a pent-up need for new cars so the automakers all cranked out what they had the tooling for which were essentially 1942 era rides. This car represents the small window between looking and acting more modern without going full-on '50s tail-fin and chrome drenched glitz.

The original color is peeking out from below the grill. That turn signal is real glass like a little lighthouse lens. The magnifying capabilities were essential as this car had a 6 volt system from the factory.

The Coronet name has had its ups and downs. Introduced in 1949, it was the highest trim level of Dodge. However starting in this year of 1954 it was knocked down a peg by the addition of the newly top-of-the-heap Dodge Royal. Just a year later it would further get the shaft, falling to the lowest trim level. What a sad story for Coronet!

Let's take a moment to admire the brushwork this shadetree mechanic uses to touch up the paint.

This is a nicely proportioned car with just about equal hood and trunk length. Notice how the roof is high enough for the hats that most men of the day were wearing. This was a legitimate concern that people noted if the headroom didn't allow for it.

That wrap-around back window is pretty slick. In the following year wrap-around windshields would really begin to take hold.
Check out the roof. You can see where the owner stood at the back corner and painted what he could reach from that one spot!

Inside is just lovely. The chrome T-handle emerging from under the left side of the dash is the parking brake.
The center cap of the steering wheel has the V symbol denoting the engine choice as well as the optional POWER STEERING written around it in gold. The radio is another option, but to the right of that there is a panel that just reads CORONET. This is the spot where the clock would be installed if it had been ordered.
*That radio cost an extra $83 back in the day; $735 today after inflation!

The upholstery looks original!

I love ancient stickers like this one.

At first glance I thought this birdcage full of flowers was painted on the rear side window, but it might be a large old sticker. Either way it's confounding and charming.

The paint job looks alright (or at least you don't notice it) from 20 or so feet, but once you get closer;

You see that parts of the body have been repaired with regular old tape painted over with a brush!
I thought this metal circle was the gas cap but the paint looks to have overlapped onto it. Maybe it hasn't gotten gas since the latest touch-up?

You can see the placement of that possible gas cap and how it is mirrored on the other side by a reverse light.

Everything in this picture is awesome! The trunk lock consists of 2 small padlocks on a hinged latch. The totally awesome and futuristic emblem is bragging about the VEight engine as well as the optional PowerFlight auto trans, and that sturdy thick glass reverse light proudly stares out from its tape and paint setting. Incidentally that PowerFlight was the first fully automatic trans offered by Dodge and it was a 2 speed.

The standard engine was the 230 inline 6 cylinder. However since this has various V8 emblems on it we know that this was built with the 241 Red Ram Hemi V8. This was the smaller version of the famous 331 FirePower Hemi first released in 1951 by Chrysler/DeSoto. Even this smaller 241 set several land speed records at the Bonneville Salt Flats in a Dodge much like this one.

Everything looks pretty normal here except, wait a minute, what's with that door handle?

WHAT!? I've been fascinated with cars since I was sitting in a stroller and I've NEVER seen this! The handle came off or something and the owner just decided to cover over it with mesh drywall tape and slap green paint over the wound? Dude. This is next-level out of the box thinking. All that original 62 year old chrome and he's slapping paint all over it too. This owner is a BEAST!

It's sporting the original set of Dodge V8-specific hubcaps. You can see the lettering used to filled in with red. Maybe I'll head back and leave a note and a jar of red house paint to see what they'll do.

Still looking cool even after all it's been through.

We'll leave this old Hemi with a glance at the awesome ram hood ornament and another V8 emblem. This is such a cool car and I'm not even mad that it looks like it's lived its life on the streets of Havana. My hope is that somebody has owned this thing since new and parks it outside their retirement apartment on the border of Coney Island and Brighton Beach. Somebody continues to love it and show it off and for that it's lucky.